Okay, so women in general apologize way too often. We apologize for everything. I know that I am a serious offender of this. My anxiety is also a big offender of the “Sorry” problem. My biggest problem is that I am always saying sorry because I feel like I should be apologizing for how my mental illnesses dictate that I act and behave in situations. I say sorry for everything. even when I don’t feel like I have done anything. I feel like I say sorry the way most people say “um” or “uh”. Since starting this blog I have come a revelation: I am done saying sorry.
This of course doesn’t mean that if I mess up or do something that I know is wrong i’m not going to apologize, that isn’t the point. The point is, when I feel the urge to say sorry, I think about the situation I’m in and whether or not it need to say it. I’m not going to apologize when I have had too much human interaction, because I can’t handle being around people for a really long time. I’m not going to apologize because I can’t get out of bed in the morning. I’m not going to apologize because I need a minute to rest or I need to take myself out of a situation because it is a trigger.
This is something I live with and I’m tired of making myself feel bad about something I can’t control by telling people I’m sorry that it happened. Sometimes, I cannot control my mental illnesses. Sometimes, they control me. While I try my best to take control of my life, there are times when it is impossible. I’m not apologizing because I am doing nothing wrong, and my mental illness is not my fault.